RockOm

By Tom Crenshaw, Tom@RockOm.net

Why is it that it most always takes a major crisis in our lives to bring about the wisdom and ultimate peace found in the act of surrendering? We come to find ourselves completely and utterly broken; a brokenness that forces us to our knees with a subsequent surrender to a higher power has precious, life changing lessons for us but only when we can learn to say "yes" to all things that come into our lives.

Deepak Chopra says of surrender, 

"The highest aim of any spiritual path is surrender. Although you may associate the word surrender with defeat or weakness, it is the most powerful spiritual action, offering you infinite freedom and possibilities. Surrender is trusting that God, the Universe, or a higher intelligence can accomplish anything, even when you can’t foresee the outcome of a situation.

"At the level of spirit, everything is always unfolding perfectly, and you don’t have to struggle or force situations to go your way. It is only your ego-mind that believes you are an isolated individual trying to survive in a hostile world. In truth, you are a spiritual being. By surrendering to Spirit, you end the struggle, freeing yourself from fear and doubt and releasing the obstacles your ego has created."

True surrender is being grateful for and learning to express heartfelt gratitude for whatever is currently going on in our lives, regardless of our current perception of what those events, conditions, and circumstances that we are experiencing may consist of.

Once we are able to effectively initiate this gratitude, we will find that those events, conditions, and circumstances that may appear to be unpleasant or working against our desired outcomes will, with almost magical certainty, cease to exist. We'll then begin to be able to see them change and begin turning into events, conditions, and circumstances that clearly are bringing us closer to our desired outcomes. Here are some songs that can help us open to the idea of surrender with new eyes, ears and hearts.

SONG: “Living Prayer” by Alison Krauss (listen)

EXCERPT: “In your love I find release/A haven from my unbelief/Take my life and let me be/A living prayer, my God to Thee.”

REFLECTION: The Apostle Paul writes in Ephesians, “Lord, I believe. Help me with my disbelief.” Alison Krauss comes in a close second here evoking the same message as she relays that in God’s love we can find a “peace that passes all understanding” if we surrender our beliefs and life to a higher power. Surrendering does not mean we lose anything, it means we can let our lives, through surrender  be “living prayers” to God and all beings.

SONG: “Bad” by U2 (listen)

EXCERPT: “This desperation, dislocation, separation, condemnation, revelation, in temptation, isolation, desolation/Let it go/And so fade away…/Surrender.”

REFLECTION: Bono’s vague lyrics here are open to interpretation but are reportedly about a friend's heroin addiction. We can use these words to remind us whatever we are experiencing that is undesirable can be let go of, that we can let our experience, our story pass into the presence of that which accepts all our faults without judgment. In this song Bono's voice  soars into the realms of both pain and exasperation, as well as velvety consolation in an effort to convey the experience of moving aside and letting all things “fade away.”

SONG: “Mind Games” by John Lennon (listen)

EXCERPT: “Yes is the answer/And you know that for sure/Yes is surrender/You got to let it, you got to let it go.”

REFLECTION: John Lennon was inspired to write "Mind Games" from a book authored by Robert Masters and Jean Houston which accentuated the force of the human brain to induce various states of consciousness. The song's positive message reminds us that saying "yes" IS the key to surrender and allowing for answers to come. By expressing "yes" we move into a higher state of being and from this openness, a space for peace and healing expands and possibilities are endless.

YOUR TURN: What songs speak to you about surrendering and letting go of preconceived outcomes allowing for new possibilities and insight?

By Trevor Harden, Trevor@RockOm.net

Writer and Buddhist nun Pema Chodron has said that it is "better to join in with humanity than to set ourselves apart." This is certainly true, but it could be argued that we, in fact, cannot be set apart except through our own misunderstanding. We are all inseparable from the whole, an integral piece of all that is. In Calculus we pick a point on a line and then observe things from that perspective. But there really is no point on the line; it is arbitrarily chosen so that there can be discussion. In the same way, you and I - as well as every "thing" in the universe - is simply a "point in the line" of the cosmos. We are all intricately connected and can no more be separated than a wave can be separated from water.

And yet, for many different reasons, there are times when we feel alone. Separate. Isolated. Unconnected. We feel we have no community, no place to belong and we don't feel accepted by people or the world around us. This is no doubt a mental construction, but it certainly doesn't feel anything less than real. Therefore we often need to be encouraged and reminded that we do belong, that we are accepted and that we are a part of something far bigger than our loneliness.

For those times, here are a few songs that may help...

SONG: "Belong" by Chris Rice (Listen)

EXCERPT: "Pool reflects an orphan child / Dirty, lost, alone and wild / Fatherless and nameless still / Fallen heart and broken / will there ever be a place where I belong?"

REFLECTION: This song by Chris Rice both poses the question (Will there ever be a place where I belong?) as well as answers it as the song develops. Chris come to find his answer in God - that by seeing himself as a child of God and as a brother of Jesus, he recognizes his grand divine inheritance and part in the universal family. Perhaps this will mean something to you as well the next time you feel as though you don't belong.

SONG: "A Place in this World" by Taylor Swift (Listen)

EXCERPT: "I'm alone, on my own and I'm starting off / I'll be strong, I'll be wrong, oh, but life goes on / Oh, I'm just a girl trying to find a place in this world"

REFLECTION: Although this song doesn't exactly answer the problem, empathizing with the suffering of others often allows us to move through our own suffering. In this song, Taylor Swift speaks to her loneliness and need to find her "place in this world." Perhaps in the sharing of someone else's search for meaning and belonging, we can begin to understand our own.

SONG: "Innocent" by Our Lady Peace (Listen)

EXCERPT: "Tina’s losing faith in what she knows / Hates her music, hates all of her clothes / Thinks of surgery and a new nose / Every calorie is a war / While she wishes she was a dancer / And that she'd never heard of cancer / She wishes God would give her some answers / And make her feel beautiful"

REFLECTION: When we take the position of being a separate being in a cold outside world, we often look long and hard for our place and where we belong, even going to destructive means to try and fit in. But if we can come to understand and accept just how connected we already are with all that is, we can relax into the peace of a divine and universal acceptance.

YOUR TURN: What songs speak to you about belonging, connection, acceptance and battling loneliness?

By Trevor Harden, Trevor@RockOm.net

The word forgiveness gets tossed around a lot in religious circles, to the point where it has almost become a watered-down concept. But the religious community's long history of insistence upon forgiveness is just and its practice is paramount for the spiritual life. At its core forgiveness is - alongside the Hokey Pokey - what it's all about.

Within the act of forgiveness lies so many spiritual layers: choosing the present moment over the past, having compassion for others, deciding to focus on another's divine inheritance as opposed to their misguided or wrong behavior, trusting a process larger than yourself, acceptance of "what is" and opening yourself to be a channel of divine love.

Sometimes we are stuck, however. Though we know what treasures await us and others on the other side of forgiveness, we often are too hung up to fully forgive. For the times when we need additional encouragement to pardon those who have hurt us, and to be open to the supreme act of forgiveness, here are some songs that may expedite the process.

SONG: "The Heart of the Matter" by Don Henley (Listen)

EXCERPT: "I'm learning to live without you now / But I miss you sometimes / The more I know, the less I understand / All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning again / I've been tryin' to get down / To the heart of the matter / ... / But I think its about forgiveness, forgiveness / Even if you don't love me anymore"

REFLECTION: Forgiving someone doesn't always mean you have to understand why or what went wrong. It is deciding to accept what has happened and then to move ahead in love, for the good of all involved. And even if the concern or forgiveness is not reciprocated, you can only control yourself and your own actions.

SONG: "Let It Go" by Tim McGraw (Listen)

EXCERPT: "Today I’m gonna keep on walking / I’m gonna hold my head up high / I’m gonna leave it all behind / Today I’m gonna stand out in the rain / Let it wash it all away, Yeah wash it all away"

REFLECTION: Sometimes the person you most need to forgive is yourself. Can you allow the rain of acceptance to wash away your past pain? Can you forgive yourself for all that you feel you've done wrong in the same way that an eraser removes all the marks from a chalkboard? Perhaps I'm overgeneralizing as it is rarely that simple. But it can be done, and with a spirit of surrender it's easier than you think.

SONG: "What I Cannot Change" by LeAnn Rimes (Listen)

EXCERPT: "I will learn to let go what I cannot change / I will learn to forgive what I cannot change / I will learn to love what I cannot change / But I will change, I will change / Whatever I, whenever I can"

REFLECTION: Forgiveness is often a two-sided coin. One one side, radical acceptance of things as they are. On the other, new action and new habits so that you no longer hurt yourself and others. Whatever needs changed to prevent future pain, there is no day like today to take care of it.

YOUR TURN: What songs speak to you about forgiveness?

By Trevor Harden, trevor@RockOm.net

We all require companions for the journey. Friends are indeed our very support system and the best friends not only accept us for who we are but spur us on to all that we can potentially become.

For this reason, artists and musicians throughout all time have sung the praises of camaraderie. Some of have been sappy ("Friends" by Michael W. Smith or "That's What Friends Are For", anybody?) and others have spoken to generations ("Bridge Over Troubled Water"). But as it is the artist's job to reflect upon life, it is no wonder there are so many songs about friendship.

What follows is a short list of those that stand out to me. There are hundreds of popular songs about friendship, so I invite you to leave your favorites in the comments.

SONG: "Lean On Me" by Bill Withers (Listen)

EXCERPT: "Lean on me, when you're not strong / And I'll be your friend / I'll help you carry on / For it won't be long / 'Til I'm gonna need / Somebody to lean on"

REFLECTION: Sometimes the simplest statement is the most profound. With a melody and lyrics known the world over, "Lean On Me" is one of those timeless songs that continues to speak today. Simply put the song speaks to relying on one another - and how that's not only alright, but is somewhat expected. It's so easy to let pride and ego get in the way. We don't want to seem needy. We don't want to look like we can't take care of things ourselves. But sometimes we can't. And yet true friends have no issue in picking up your slack or lending a hand. "If there is a load you have to bear that you can't carry, I'm right up the road. I'll share your load, if you just call me."

SONG: "With a Little Help from My Friends" by The Beatles (Listen)

EXCERPT: "I get by with a little help from my friends / get high with a little help from my friends / gonna try with a little help from my friends"

REFLECTION: As mentioned in this post's intro, our friends do indeed support us, providing stability in times of weakness. You could even say that their presence grants us strength. When you need help getting by, climbing out of depression or gathering courage in the face of difficulties, knowing you have folks on your team can really give you the mental fortitude to pull through. "Do you need anybody?" Your friends "need someone to love." Let that be you.

SONG: "Umbrella" by Rihanna (Listen)

EXCERPT: "Said I'll always be a friend / Took an oath, I'ma stick it out till the end / Now that it's raining more than ever / Know that we'll still have each other / You can stand under my umbrella"

REFLECTION: While this song has somewhat come and gone from the pop scene, it's one of the most popular recent songs about friendship. The sentiment is that as we move through life, our truest friends remain even as life circumstances (physical location, status, lifestyle, etc.) change. And although critics often dog on Facebook for actually preventing people from having true relationships, I've found that its been an amazing way to stay in touch with friends from past "eras" of my life such as college and high school. Our circumstances have no doubt changed, but I'm quite confident that if "the rain ever came", these folks would be there to offer support in whatever way they would be able to.

SONG: "Wish You Were Here" by Pink Floyd (Listen)

EXCERPT: "How I wish, how I wish you were here / We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl / year after year / Running over the same old ground."

REFLECTION: I chose this last song as one that speaks to the opposite of friendship."Wish You Were Here" is ultimately about detachment, alienation, and withdrawal. It is an encouragement to not only empathize with the pain of those who experience these feelings but also a warning to not allow ourselves to slip into this mode. When the darkness comes in the form of loneliness or it seems the only answer is to retreat within yourself, you can take a cue from any of the other songs on this list and realize, as James Taylor puts it, "all you have to do is call and I'll be there... you've got a friend."

YOUR TURN: Which of the many songs about friendship speak the most to you?

By Trevor Harden, trevor@RockOm.net

How we use or invest our time says a lot about what we value. Time can be utilized positively in worthwhile projects, compassionate outreaches or spiritually-enhancing activities. It can equally be piddled away or even overtaken by mundane, daily tasks. Sometimes, though, just knowing this isn't enough. It's just too damn easy to take the path of least resistance and let the time fly by without any regard to how we're spending it.

So for those times when you need some extra motivation, here are a few songs that might give you the "juice" you need. We invite and encourage you to leave additional song suggestions in the comments.

SONG: "One Day Too Late" by Skillet (Listen)

EXCERPT: "So much to do and so much I need to say / Will tomorrow be too late? / Feel the moment slip into the past / Like sand through an hourglass / In the madness I guess I just forget / To do all the things I said"

REFLECTION: Procrastination seems to be in our blood. We all do it to varying degrees, but it just seems to be inherent to continually put off what we don't feel like doing. What are you putting off today that could just be worked through and completed? Spend a moment contemplating why you're afraid or unable to tackle the task, and you just may see that putting it off is more painful than getting it done. "Tomorrow may be one day too late."

SONG: "Time" by Pink Floyd (Listen)

EXCERPT: "You are young and life is long and there is time to kill today / And then one day you find ten years have got behind you / No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun"

REFLECTION: Much like the last song, these lyrics are hinting at the slow creeping of time. In looking back and seeing how much time has passed, we discover the feelings of either joy and satisfaction or of regret and disappointment. And yet, today is the only day we have. Don't beat yourself up over lost time, but at the same time realize that today is part of tomorrow's past. Live today so that when you look back upon it, it brings you the satisfaction in knowing you it to its fullest potential.

SONG: "Life Means So Much" by Chris Rice (Listen)

EXCERPT: "Every day is a bank account / And time is our currency / So nobody's rich, nobody's poor / We get 24 hours each / So how are you gonna spend? / Will you invest, or squander? / Try to get ahead? / Or help someone who's under?"

REFLECTION: As an experiment, cut out 24 small pieces of paper, representing the 24 hours of the day. Then tonight, before you go to bed, allot those 24 "bills" to what you're going to "spend" them on tomorrow. On each paper, write how you're going to spend that hour: "Spend uninterrupted quality time with my family," "Finish up the blueprints," "Call my hurting friend," "Rest and recharge through sleep," or otherwise. In the same way that credit cards and electronic transfers don't give us the same experience as spending cold hard cash, perhaps experiencing a tangible expression of your "time currency" may be a valuable experiment.

SONG: "Cat's In the Cradle" by Harry Chapin (Listen)

EXCERPT: "My son turned ten just the other day / He said, 'Thanks for the ball, Dad, come on let's play / Can you teach me to throw?', I said 'Not today / I got a lot to do', he said, 'That's ok'"

REFLECTION: Relationships are one of the essential pillars of life. The oft quoted John Donne quote comes to mind, "No man is an island unto himself." Therefore, in our quest to spend our time wisely in meaningful work, let us not neglect those around us who are in need of our love and attention. No matter how "spiritual" or meaningful the activity or task is at hand, if we ignore our friends, families, and neighbors in the process, then what are we really accomplishing?

Your Turn: What songs motivate you as pertains to the use of your time?